RE: I'm trapped

This is sooo well put! And I'm sorry that you're trapped in this. I struggle with these exact 'demons'. Productivity and procrastination - the things I should be doing, and the things I end up doing. It really piles up and weights a ton.

In my case, as a visual artist, and I'm sure in your case too, as a musician, Social Media and the presence of AI adds to this feeling of simply not being able to keep up (even if you do get up and make something).

As someone who struggled with very paralyzing anxiety for years without finding the keys, I was able to break the cycle with the help of a psychologist. It has gotten so bad that self-talking and meditations simply were not doing it for me. If you can find a trusted, well rated professional to talk to, this can potentially help a lot.

The mind is both the most powerful and the weakest tool we have; and sometimes it needs a pro tune-up.

Also being out in nature really does help put it all in perspective. We get really lost in the expectations we strap ourselves in. Being in a room or constantly in front of a screen makes things worse. So when you have a chance, give yourself a day of just nature away from urban views, and bring with you your least fancy guitar.