Beyond The Looking Glass - Words of the Unseen - Chapter 76
๐ฆ๐ธ๐ป๐ญ ๐ซ๐ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ช๐พ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ธ๐ป
Beyond The Looking Glass is the second book in the Unseen series, a story that came to me from the other side. A story where I thought I was just the narrator until I heard the Words of the Unseen.
This second story goes beyond time and place and mixes the long ago with the here and now. Because history keeps repeating, until we learn and do something about it.
Beyond The Looking Glass - Words of the Unseen - Chapter 76
I looked over the edge again, part of me had wanted to end it all here. A very small part, a part that did not even dare to look over that edge.
Never had I felt this low, not even that night on that kitchen floor when I had two jobs and no place to sleep.
My ex-girlfriend allowed me to stay with her for a bit right after I had to leave my apartment and waited on the compensation that never came.
That was a sweet thing to do, but in a week or so her new boyfriend spent a night with her and well you donยดt want your ex near you as she only had a studio apartment.
So she asked me to sleep in the kitchen of that student's house, and I did. I woke up in the middle of the night, on the dirty floor of a kitchen while a group of students loudly went upstairs after a drunk night out.
I felt so homeless, till now I had never felt so hopeless.
Maybe I am still not as hopeless as I was back then. I have a house, we can pay the rent, we have a functioning car, and food in the fridge.
If my life is not as bad as it was back then when I had to work two jobs and lived out of a suitcase with whomever had a room to spare. Then why did I feel like a total fuck up this time?
The answer was as simple as the question. That time it was hardly my fault, it was mainly bad luck that got me on that kitchen floor.
This time it was me, and me not wanting to see. Me needing a huge kick in the butt. I was very angry with Deliah for making me stay, but she did the right thing.
Maybe not for all the right reasons, as I think she was not that saddened by the idea that I would be away for months making money for our family. But her not putting an arm around me and telling me it would be alright made things very clear and simple.
There was only one way out of here and that was my way.
Back then I could not go home crying, I had two jobs and a life. I just missed a roof and yes it took me six months to eventually get one, but I got there and I still had those jobs.
This time I had a roof, a family, and a life, I just lacked a second job and again I could not go back home crying.
The thing was, that this time I could not sleep at a friend's place, I really had to do it myself.
That was scary as hell because it meant doing away with both my pride & insecurity. I had no option then to go bar to bar offering my services and giving them my number in case they needed anyone any time soon.
Was it ego, pride, fear? I am not sure but something weighed heavy on my chest. something really did now want me to go down that path... but I heard a steady voice telling me to face my dragons.
Yes Dragons, not Daemons, and I did. I think it took me a day or two to gather the strength and stop hiding in my room.
Over the next two days, I went into all the bars in Carihuela and asked if they needed someone.
I faced my dragons, and I got some options that might call me in the next couple of weeks. I wondered if I still had enough money for weeks.
Wondered, not worried because the same voice that told me to face my dragons told me that work would come if I faced my dragons. I did not trust that voice wholeheartedly, but I did put my faith in that message.
That did not stop me from going to the only temp agency in town, which thanks to the crisis had nothing to offer.
Staring at my phone, waiting for it to ring. I knew it had to ring soon because the next month's rent was due in a week.
I got up, put it away, and went to the internet place across the street. Deliah and I kept mainly in touch through email as calling was expensive, and mobile data was even worse.
I sat down in front of the screen, ready to tell her I did everything I could but still no news, when my phone rang.
Damn, a Granada number, that meant still no work. I picked up and the voice on the other side of the line started talking rapidly.
It took me a while to remember the owner of that voice, and even longer to realize what it was saying.
"Next Tuesday, at the flattened piece of ground next to the road above your Cortijo. At six in the morning, we will start."
In my best Spanish, which was still terrible I acted as if I had a clue where he was going on about.
"Yes, remember.... Ehh Six Morning, next Tuesday 2 July. Perfecto. Gracias."
"Perfecto, we will talk then," said the voice on the other side and then ended the call.
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Personal Story With A Soundtrack - A New Adventure - Part 2
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The Closure - Alice in ArtWorkLand:
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