Into Irrelevancy

I think one of the reasons that society in general is so disrupted and volatile at the moment is, that there is an ongoing fight against irrelevancy. Over the last half a century there has been a very strong shift toward individualism, however there hasn't been anything to substitute in the place of community participation. Instead of having purpose with and for others, it became a quest to increase individual pleasure instead. This goes against two million years of our evolution.


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And it shows.

The amount of people who are obsessive compulsively looking for control, looking for belonging, looking for some purpose and meaning, is massive. And instead of working out what could be a positive meaning, the instant gratification conditioning kicks in to trigger the convenience mechanisms to find whatever is easiest to join - a social movement. But despite the name, they aren't actually social, much like the digital social networks.

Instead, they are a bunch of individuals that gather around the same bonfire telling their story, *all at the same time. They aren't there to listen to others, they are there to get whatever they can off their chest, to be heard, even though no one is listening. Because the irony is that while everyone is looking for some level of relevancy in this life, no one is willing to make anyone else other than themselves relevant in their life.

We have had the "don't care what others think" phrase pushed at us over and over, but we should absolutely care what others think, because we are all in this together. Caring enough to listen and understand other people's perspectives is different to being a slave to their words and guided only by thoughts of others.

It is possible to listen with love, and still disagree.

And we should be tying our purpose to others, because if we only look to fulfil the purpose for ourselves, we not only lose much of the value of activity and the opportunity to compound, but we also create a world where we are less impactful, less relevant, more isolated - and losing humanity. The fact is no matter how independent we might like to believe we are, we are all in this together and as such, there are a myriad interdependencies that we will constantly keep hitting against if we do not consider others into our activities. We can spend all the time and effort to please ourselves, and only end up in a constant battle with others, and falling well below our potentials.

Yesterday, there was a mass shooting in Austria, one of many such events these days, and again - it is all about trying to be relevant. People are willing to take other's lives just to feel like they matter in some way, that they have some kind of control. And yes, obviously it is an extreme event, but the entire internet is geared toward getting attention, and trying to be relevant for an audience - mostly for no economic value - just a feeling.

Being relevant in other's lives is important.

But, relevant for what? A rapist is relevant in the life of their victim, as is an abusive parent who beats and starves a child? Is that the kind of relevancy people have chosen, because it is far easier to do the wrong thing, than the right thing? Is it out of convenience. And yeah, I know what you are thinking, that these things aren't about relevancy, but they are. These cruel people want to make an impact too - they want to participate, they want to leave their mark. They want to have control over others.

Aren't there better ways?

We all want to be relevant in some way, and one of the ways I go about it is here on Hive through my writing. It might not change the world, but it gives me the opportunity to interact and share my thoughts, and listen to those of others. It gives a chance for discussion and friendships, as well as conflicts to form also. And, it does leave a mark on the blockchain and maybe for a brief moment or maybe for much longer, an impression on the thinking of others, and possibly, even an action or two. It isn't a blast to the masses, it is acting locally at the thought level, with individuals gathered around a common campfire, talking about our lives, and listening to the lives of others.

And then we go away from the discussion and live our lives in the real world, but are we any different? Perhaps, perhaps not. But maybe, just maybe over time, there is some shift in us for the better - or at least I hope there is for those that spend time reading here and talking here, with me. The changes might be tiny - but small changes are still changes.

Do you feel positively relevant each day?

I don't mean all day, but just even a little bit in someone else's life. It could be you holding a door open for someone at the store, or saying well done to a colleague for a good job. Maybe it is just a simple smile and thank you to the cashier, while looking into their eyes. Maybe we should all find a few more ways to make ourselves relevant, for others.

  • Have you been positively relevant today?

  • Have you been negatively relevant today?

Who was relevant in your life today? How and Why?

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]


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19 comments
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We used to have neighborhoods where people actually knew each other, now we're all scrolling alone wondering why we feel empty. Chasing likes isn't the same as genuine connection after all, I wonder how long it'll take the next generation to figure that out

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I wonder how long it'll take the next generation to figure that out

Perhaps the next next generation. I think the ones here now are probably already too screwed.

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Perhaps it's already too late

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I think a lot of this goes back to the empathy deficit that I have been talking about for quite some time now.

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In many ways yes. We no longer want to listen to others, we just want to get our shit into their ears.

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That's definitely an interesting way to put it!

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We all want to be relevant in what we do in other to be better than the what we've achieve in the past to keep the consistency moving however it requires dedication, time and hardwork in securing that aim.

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Time and hardwork on the right things perhaps. People seem to put a lot of time and energy into getting nothing done.

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I think it is fundamental to raise a culture where listening is valued together with expression. This balance could lead to more significant connections and contributions to society.

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where listening is valued together with expression.

Good point. "express yourself" has been pushed - form good relationships with others, has not.

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Selfishness is one of the things I dislike the most. Selfish people move away from society while pursuing their own individuality. This causes problems and dead ends in the long run.

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This causes problems and dead ends in the long run.

Winning all the way into loneliness and dysfunction.

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I have been positively relevant today by wrapping up the final pieces of the house sale. Sorted out the keys and remotes for garages and for the gate.

Took out the photography backgrounds and transported them to our house. Now I am ready to take studio family pictures 😀

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Is that positive for the new buyers? ;D ;D

Took out the photography backgrounds and transported them to our house. Now I am ready to take studio family pictures

You have backgrounds?! Can't wait to see some.

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Sure is, they wanted those keys and remotes sorted out and extra stuff sorted out :)

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We traded belonging for finding ourselves and now everyone's chronically lonely despite being more connected than ever. No wonder mental health is tanking, we're wired for tribes, not TikTok.

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Lily finished a school project yesterday in the evening. She had a month time. It was a costume that she had to make herself out of things we had at home. She picked it all out herself, got going very nicely and motivated - but frustration was around the corner. She wanted to stop many times, and I had to push her through (it was frustrating for me, too). But she did it. And she loves it. And she's so proud of it, and it feels so great for me to see comprehend so many things that I told her during the process - it takes practice to sew, but you'll get faster. It takes effort to accomplish a great thing. Sometimes you have to repeat if you did something wrong, but it's worth it.

I made her pancakes. Inner week. It's a Saturday thing, but I was so happy for her, and I wanted to make her see how special that was, that she persisted. She was very relevant for me today, for having a great day. And I'm pretty sure that I was relevant to her as well.

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I have the curse of the relevant guy for a couple of dozens of others and their families. Trying to be also useful for my own family, as well. But in the ways that I choose as important. I can say, motivationally, you have been, and you still are, relevant to me. My builder's archetype definitely feels supported here. Virtual kicks in the butt they might be, but they work.

Cheers and Peace!
(That's also a Hivean expression)

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