RE: I was a musician. I was never a good one
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I'm not saying you are or anything, but definitely don't feel at all responsible for influencing his decision from that chat. Obviously he was in a bad place, and doesn't really sound like he had any support system in place. Just fucking sucks that all his family failed him and yeah, someone should have made a report 100 percent. CPS isn't great, but it would have been something and he probably would have ended up better off.
There's not much you could have done though, man. When people are that deep in a well of despair they never think to ask for help because they feel they don't deserve it. You talking about that made me think of my buddy who hung himself a few years ago. He kind of just went unhinged for the months leading up to it, where I avoided interacting with him anymore because he just seemed so off. Randomly taking shots at mutual friends publicly out of the blue saying nasty shit. He also started posting a lot on social media about being lonely in awkward ways and many people made attempts to try to connect but he just blew it off or it never filled that gaping hole that he had I guess. Just hard to get people to crawl out of that mental space when they're spiraling.
well honestly there was a time right after it happened that of course while I didn't blame me, I always wondered what could have been if I had reached out a bit more. The thing is, he didn't seem sad in the messages we were having with one another. Now I suppose you could say that I am a bit traumatized by the whole situation and if someone contacts me that I haven't heard from in years, I worry that it might be a similar situation.
The attitude situation was similar though with my guy as the one you described. I was never really all that active in FB but I would see comments from him towards people I know he has been friends with for a long time and they were overtly aggressive to the point of revealing quite private information about them. He was always on the attack it seemed.
Anyway... he's gone. and nobody that I know that was close to him had any idea that this was incoming. What can you do?