Fielding Parent Time "Comparisons"
In addition to our main jobs as musicians and performers, both my wife and I also teach a bit on our instruments, but privately and also at institutions/universities. It is a sort of neccessary thing to do as freelancers, to diversify as much as possible the income streams... even though, if we had our way, we would only perform! However, teaching does give the more reliable income flow, as performing work is quite variable from month to month... and having a steadier stream of income means that we can also pick and choose what sorts of performing that we choose to do.
Anyway, the downside to teaching some of the younger children privately is the fact that we also need to sometimes deal with interesting parents. Most of them are great, but there are always going to a couple that are a pain in the arse... but they tend to don't last the year, as we just drop them. But we do give them a little bit... just in case, they have a bad moment, or just to make sure that it is a real ongoing thing...
So, recently, I had a student that was being a pain in the arse, refusing to do what I asked and willfully ignoring me and doing everything and anything else. Whilst smiling and opening trying to get a rise out of me... he does this quite often, and I refuse to take the bait and keep at it until he gets bored and just does what I ask... but it is incredibly draining. And with the parent in the room, just playing with their phone. If it were my kid, they would be in for a public embarrassing dressing down... I asked my kids about this, and they said that they would never even dare to try out what this kid was doing. That said, we give our kids lots of latitude at other times, but when they need to behave and concentrate, they had better do it.
And so, I cut the lesson at exactly the finish time... and the mother complained that the previous lesson went a few minutes over, and that we should keep going for another few minutes. ARRRAHRRHGHGHGHG... that is a great way to blacklist yourself... I'm pretty sure I won't be inviting them back into the studio at the end of the year.
But still... a few minutes, it isn't a big problem... except they never pay me extra when I go over time. Pretty much every other student family that I have is quite flexible with this... they know that I mostly go over, but there are moments when I will need to finish a little before. And no problem... but there are always the time counters and nit-pickers. I'm definitely setting an alarm for finishing next time and every other time for this one.
And when I was talking to my wife about this... she said that she had one parent complain that her darling child only got the lesson time that she paid for, whilst other students got extra time. My wife said that she feigned ignorance and said something along the lines of "fancy that"... But didn't say the truth out loud. The other kid works hard and brings lots to work on, listens and is a pleasure to teach... whilst the other, does no work, and makes the seconds tick away slowly.
At some point, I wonder if it is better to say that out loud... you child is a pain in the arse to teach and does no work. Sure, we probably would lose a student... but it wasn't a student that we wanted to teach in the first place!
Anyway, both of us are starting to reach that point... less students, less income, more happiness!
WORTH IT!
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It's just a thing isn't it XD
I think I'm really lucky that all of my parents so far have been fantastic xD The ones that have felt the need to come talk to me are usually telling me I'm doing a great job with their babies or concerned that their babies aren't concentrating/putting in enough effort.
I think there were a couple that were less fantastic but seems my boss got them before they got to me (or perhaps they went to her first, I'm not sure which, either way I found out about them later).
Meanwhile there have been other parents (none of mine) that were getting narky because their babies weren't ready for badge but were still insisting that they should be doing it (and then getting upset when they didn't pass...because the kids either weren't ready because they weren't ready as some take longer than others, or they weren't coming to many classes, or they weren't doing the work they needed to be doing when they were there etc).
Maybe you should diplomatically mention that the kid is the problem? XD I have done that with the kids themselves on a couple of occasions (most of them now understand how I can tell when they've done certain drills or not by the time they get to me regardless of whether I was looking/got them to show me the drill or not). Or because they apparently need things spelled out just say every now and again you might need to go over a few minutes to finish explaining something or make sure they've gotten something and there's no point if it looks like their attention has gone for the day?
I'll let youngest know that he will definitely have to have a side gig, like you he just wants to perform whenever he gets good enough to be able to do so XD
Yeah, my wife had a bit of a up-front no holds barred talk with one her problem students... and it worked out really well. I guess I should do that at some point, the worse that could happen is that I lose a student that I didn't want to teach anyway...
With most kids who aren't putting the effort it's mostly the fact that they're forced to do it.
Kids who genuinely have an interest in learning something would try to learn.
Yeah... and for some, it is all fun until they have to actually put work into getting better.