Mentally, don't be a butterfly.

There is so much that can be said if we could have a chat with our younger selves, turn back the hands of time, or even get into a time machine. If all these were possible, mistakes would be unmade, regrets not happening, and maybe life would be clearer for my younger self.

I remember how I lived some years back. It is unsettling to see how my human emotions have been used on many occasions by people close to me because they know I won't turn a blind eye to things around me.

Over the years of my minimalism practice, I have learnt a lot, am still learning, and know that there's more learning to be taken note of in the future. Through all these years of self learning, I have come to learn more about minding my business mentally (cos I do mind business, lol), which would have yielded a better result if my younger self knew this.

I was (still a tad bit am) the type of person that is always ready to give her last penny to someone I care about. I can remember different moments, I have given out my savings to a neighbor and never got them back or half back. Some have taken my silence as a means to hold on to it because they know they are older than I was. And others, when asked, would give a little, then turn the tables around that they've given all.

Proper documentation! I never did that when I was younger. I only knew how to give but never documenting, and this had made me look like a fool to people who owed me. And because of this, mentally, I had a butterfly mind. You know, that moment when your mind is unsettled because there's a lot you'd like to say but still don't want to hurt others with your words. I have a high level of emotional intelligence, which makes it hard for me not to give something when their sorry story gets to me.

If my younger self knew how to properly document things, maybe things would have been better because having an unsettling mind disrupts my peaceful mind which most times leads to frustration and this is one of the reasons I don't interact with humans much but they always found me.

Being a partly introvert in my younger days, I barely step out, which is something I love because it gives me peace. However, these people would come to my home and ask for me. My dad usually calls me a little banker because I love saving money a lot. But the down part was that I never knew there was the need to write down what someone borrowed from me and even let them know. Subtract anything given back with the date in their presence and so much more that deals with documentation. If I had dived in more minimalism at that age, I would have known how to manage my funds better.

Also, I wasn't the type that would tell my parents that this woman or that person borrowed some money from me. At that age, I was intelligent enough to know this could serve as an embarrassment to them that married people are coming to a child to borrow money to start a business or do some other things. I never told anyone this, and those people knew too, and with this, it was easier for them, sadly to take and never return or return what they want and lie their way out.

This gets my mind unsettled, and I end up feeling pained by it, but the most disturbing part was that I still won't tell on them because I didn't want them to be embarrassed, lol.

However, I know better now. The need for proper documentation of things, especially money related. Through minimalism, I understood better that there are things that seem mundane but disturb our peace of mind. Also, knowing the kind of person I am emotionally, I have learned and still learning of ways to not let my peaceful state be disrupted by not interacting with people much to the extent of knowing about their personal life. I know my conscience would hold me to the throat if they ask to borrow some money or something, and I know they need it and not give it.

But when I give it and they do not return it, especially when I need it, it becomes a problem. Knowing I am not the sort of person that begs people, especially financially, I'll end up having no one to turn to, which will leave me in a mess.

Also, speaking to my younger self, I'd advise her to learn more skills, especially the keyboard at that young age, because it'll serve more as a mentally relaxing tone for her older self. And more especially, she won't be the one paying for it 😅.

This is my response to the #Kiss Minimalist Community prompt on minimalist advice to the younger self.

_{Images used are mine and video from #YouTube}.

Still yours truly,
Balikis.

Thanks for reading and listening.

Peace be unto those who crave it and more to those who chase it away.